Thursday, October 29, 2009

Random update

I feel creative these days and am planning and messing around making Christmas presents. They are going to turn out well if I can get the adhesive issues worked out. I had fun shopping for supplies and spent under 12 bones so far and only expect to spend about 5 more and thats if I need different glue.
I am even making my own boxes to put the little gifts in!
My needs are being met and my relationship is growing allowing me to explore creative outlets. Its been a while and I am enjoying it.
I am still not feeling well physically. I have a cough that won't quit and feel exhausted all the time. Life is always bitter sweet! I want to run but get tired just thinking about it. The plan is to run when the weather will allow and lift weights and train with Jaymon through the winter and then start running again in preparation for the Childserve Run 4 the Kids race 5k which I plan to place in my age group and the Dam to Dam 20k. I am enjoying thinking of it while I am sitting here not moving much.  I am starting to think that this is one of those situations where I need to run a few miles just to get the blood pumping and help those white blood cells to circulate.

We went walking around downtown by the river a few days ago while Jupiter was at respite camp, which
 he loves by the way, and Sam was catching snakes at Sean's house, so it was Jaymon and I and the 2 little ones. I had my Target mens cheapo trainers on. The top of my right foot started hurting and kept getting worse and worse until I took my shoes off. I had Archimedes on my back in the Babyhawk so the added weight probably added to the pain but it was quite clear that my feet have changed. It seems as if the very structure has changed and the bones and tendons no longer seem to tolerate the padded and confined foot coffins that I  thought for so long that  I had to have.
After this realization that I did not have shoes even to walk around in regardless of my winter running solution I needed something for just walking around and I should give something a shot.
My Runners World friend Shelley bought a pair of shoes and reviewed them on her blog. I have been thinking and spending much time shopping online for the perfect solution and finally came to the conclusion that whatever solution I think I have come up with will most certainly have flaws and its very unlikely that I will love any pair of shoes I buy. I do not like shoes anymore. They hurt and I am not interested with the fashion either.
 I ordered a pair of Teva Proton 4 shoes tonight and am excited for their arrival and to take them out for a spin. They look like they will suit my needs for the Living History Farms Race in a few weeks. They also look minimal enough to allow me to keep my form and  keep the tootsies warm in the cold weather.

The house I had dreamed of sold and I was very disappointed.  I had envisioned a life there and it was hard to let go of the lovely fantasies and trust that something else and maybe something better will come along. Funny now to think that I believed that somehow we would find a way to buy it when we were not ready. I had to be reminded, thank you Jaymon, that I am happy with what I have. I like and want what I have and am so fortunate to have dreams and ambitions for the future. I very much like my life and look forward to the future.
Ups and downs and learning experiences almost every day. Learning to breathe and relax and feel stress yet react in a way that does not ruin what I have.
My 4 lovely boys to love and laugh with and a husband that I love dearly.
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I provide Bradley Method childbirth education, doula, belly casting, placenta encapsulation, and post partum doula services.
I serve families in Kitsap County, Bainbridge Island, Poulsbo, Bremerton, Silverdale, Kingston, Port Townsend, Bremerton, Port Orchard, and the greater Seattle area. email me atangiebeehotz@gmail.com with any questions you might have